Quote of the Day

"Only a retard would go to that much effort just to cuddle!"


(In response to my previous position on the salami-hiding.)


They still all play cards together. Guy has no self-respect. He can't be long for this neighborhood either, I suspect.

That's Some Talent!

Heard on the radio on the way to work yesterday:

"I like to smoke my own meat."

Yeah, I'm infantile enough that I laughed but it was a good start to the day.

Nut Grabber - You Know You Want One

Who Doesn't Love Bacon-Wrapped Beef[cake]?

So it's a Saturday night and I'm dinking around on the computer tweaking some [hold on while I take off my watch as it's digging into my flesh] xsl code and I take a break to browse some of my new regular sites. Lo and behold I am led to this fabuloso item. [Sidebar: I'm posting a link to the image because I don't want to steal images even tho I would not try to pass it off as my own but the site sucks ass so hard I can't direct-link to the item for purchase - seriously, you should check out the site, it's a really stupid user experience.]

I can't help but picture this item on 300 spartans - 300 bacon-wrapped beefcakes. Like 300 filet mignons to share with your 298 closest friends (I reserved 2 for myself - it's my blog, my fantasies).

How Much Buttcrack Would a Buttcrack Show If A Buttcrack Could Show Crack?

Well, that's a mouthful. But that's nothing compared to the eyeful of buttcrack I got today from not one but TWO people. Here's a tip: Don't bend over at work.

Another Overheard In The Office Moment:

Visitor: I have a rather large package...
Me: That's TMI, man.

What does it say about me that I'm blogging at 7pm on a friday night? I could be working, I suppose. Is that worse?

I'm an Animal Graveyard

Check out this article about extreme veganism (is that paired vegetable-eating?). These people are hilarious.

"I would not want to be intimate with someone whose body is literally made up from the bodies of others who have died for their sustenance," she said.

So those vegetables didn't die for their sustenance?

"When you are vegan or vegetarian, you are very aware that when people eat a meaty diet, they are kind of a graveyard for animals," she said.

A graveyard for animals. Bring on the meat, baby!

Flash of Non Brilliance

Divorce = Going Halfies